Thursday, 10 February 2011

mad disappointed.



Todays post is gonna be a little different.
im going to talk about failing.

do you think the term: FAIL is very debatable?
well firstly, i guess many things in the world is debatable but i think the worst kind of failure is when we fail to do what is right in God's eyes. We call this SIN.

today i had to learn a very painful lesson.
knowing that i have let down my band mates.
today because project serve was only half day,
we spent our morning having uncle yu tang.
well the food was good, no doubt bout it.

however as soon as food arrived,
i know this sounds silly but temptations started to set in because there was chilli
and being a vocalist i knew i shouldn't eat chili even though i simple love its taste.
i managed to resist temptations. however my other band mates (knowing full well that all of us shouldn't eat chilli because it might cause one of the vocalists to stumble) started to eat lunch with chilli.
i know it might sound childish but really it did start to tempt me ever more
and even worse was when i was told i could eat a little.
at that moment.. i refused but the worst thing i realised after that is how i was foolish not to advice them.
their mentality was that they can eat chilli cause they are not vocalist.
but instructions by our band leader was clearly told to us already, which was, NO CHILLI.

i was foolish because instead of loving my brothers and telling them not to eat,
i allowed them to continue.

i guess something that i learnt in Project Serve is that the opposite of LOVE
is NOT HATE but INDIFFERENCE (not doing anything)
and that was what i did today to my fellow brothers.
i think it was very selfish of me to do that cause we are a band
and we ought to be correcting one another.

You wanna know something funny that happened that is interlinked to this?
I think God was teachign me a lesson.
The day before this even occured, the performind arts band and i went to Geylang East for lunch.
I remembered that I specifically asked the lady tending the stall to cook my yong tau foo things in curry?
I remembered Delicia telling me how i shouldnt be eating curry but i told her not to worry cause my tolerance for spicy stuff is high. But this morning i woke up with a slight sore throat. (i couldnt belive it)
i guess it was just God really telling me who is in control. That its not me, not any of the other performing arts members but Him.

Praise be to God
For He knows everything.

-Irwin Zephyr Tan-

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